Friday, April 16, 2010

Random notes

...then he asks me what quality kind of things that can turn me on.
I took a moment to look at him in the eye, couldn't escape from his gleaming expectant eyes. I wish I were smarter enough to pick up every right words, I gave him a weak smile then turned my eyes to the wide view of the sea, 'I know what i'm looking for when I finally meet/see him,' I said shortly.

He sighed, kicked the loose dry earth with his sneaker shoes. Deep inside, I wish I could really confide him every thoughts i have on my mind. Then, he threw that question at me simply because we've run out of smart topics to talk about, and there were a couple of hours left to kill before the clock says ten thirty pm.

Two nights ago, I was on the phone with Green talking and making jokes about what he's gonna do in Europe for 40 days besides seeing interesting place, meeting friends, and shopping. We always become so damn silly everytime are talking to each other. There is never ever any logical comments or topics...and this is a sort of way both of us stripping ourselves off from the worries and problems in our life. Loosing up.

 Then he asked how many people I had seen since i moved to Bali. He was not the first, and presumably, will not be the last person who's gonna ask me the same out of curiosity question. My answer is always the same that will make you think I am abandoning myself into Celibacy, which is, honestly, laughable.

The thing is I do keep my eyes open, hold dear to such expectation that somewhere, anytime, I probably will bump into a few good gentlemen who, hopefully, have boyfriend potentials in them, or, at least, will simply stay as wonderful friendships.

And then, I asked myself what am I looking for from a man. Physical beauty attached with maturity and loyalty that comes along with great personality and great sense of humor.

Now it seems that I am asking for a picture perfect man, eh? And those so-called qualities are in random order. Wow, i just gave myself the best answer for that question!!

I am not giving myself a deadline for having a lover/partner/boyfriend. Never. I am sure life has many good things in store for me and dedicating my life to these wonderful people (and work) I have on this island will be more than I can ask for.

Besides, I am surrounded with beautiful souls though they are far away in those continents. A big shoutout for Sina, Servaas,  Heino and Sjoerd, Mike Jansen, Jerry Fetterly, Zack, Louis Labrecque.

Life is Beautiful. Always.